


Blue Moon

by illbehonest_ilie



Category: Agent Carter (TV)
Genre: Dancing, F/F, Freedom, Memories, a little bit of steggy angst, maybe a bit of cartinelli angst but not really
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-04-25
Updated: 2015-04-25
Packaged: 2018-03-25 16:25:05
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,767
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3817087
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/illbehonest_ilie/pseuds/illbehonest_ilie
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Angie catches Peggy dancing alone and decides to cut in. Also, it’s Steve’s birthday.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Blue Moon

**Author's Note:**

> The idea for this story comes from this song: [here](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SWddzmJgKT8)

July 4th. America’s Independence Day. The day where American’s celebrate their freedom. Where the streets are packed with patriots waving American flags and the smell of burning meats were thick in the air. 

Everyone Peggy encountered was excited about the day. Even her housemate, Angie. Angie was looking forward to going back to her old neighbourhood to celebrate with everyone she knew. She would see extended family and old friends pack themselves in the tiny apartment she grew up in. And she was most excited for the fireworks that would light the night sky. The smell of sulfur and the bright lights blending nicely with the dark background of the sky. She loved the fireworks; the loud crashing noises that made her heart thump faster in her chest and the soft fizzles that brought a childish smile to her face.

But maybe she was also excited to show Peggy how real Americans celebrate the day. And maybe she was excited to stand close to her while everyone looked up at the exploding lights in the sky. 

Peggy wanted to share in her friend’s enthusiasm, but the feeling was lost to her. To Peggy, July 4th was a day of remembrance; not for the country but for a man- Steve Rogers. Today was also Captain Steve Roger’s birthday.

Peggy thought the day would be easier to endure since she had poured his blood over the East River, but she was wrong. The day was still painful, even if other days weren’t. Since pouring his blood, Peggy was happier or at least more willing to move on with her life. And Angie was part of her newfound happiness, but even she couldn’t bring Peggy out of her depression.

It took Peggy an hour longer to get out of bed this morning, and her morning routine seemed to drag on forever. And no matter how hard Angie tried to cheer her up during breakfast, Peggy wouldn’t say anything more than a few words.

Peggy knew this wasn’t fair to Angie. She could see the look of worry in those bright blue eyes, and practically hear the questions in the young woman’s mind. Angie had never seen Peggy like this and she had no idea why. And when she asked, the other woman just said she wasn’t feeling well. Angie didn’t believe her, and Peggy knew that, but she was grateful that the younger woman didn’t press the matter further.

After breakfast, Peggy spent the rest of the morning in her room while Angie spent the morning in the kitchen baking pie’s for the party at her parent’s house. She could smell the sweet pastries all the way in her room and she could her the faint sounds of Angie humming. 

Peggy’s heart leaped at the thought of the young woman, but joy escaped her. She wanted to be happy with Angie. She wanted to run downstairs and help bake pies. She wanted to take Angie to her family’s party and be the cause of most of her smiles, but the weight in her heart stopped her. The thought of Steve stopped her. She felt unfaithful at the thought of wanting to be with someone else, and Peggy wanted to be with Angie. And she knew Angie wanted to be with her as well. They way they spoke to each other, the extended compliments, and the lingering touches, it was obvious to anyone with eyes, but Peggy wasn’t ready. And Angie respected that. She was just glad to be in Peggy’s life, and she was happy with just being her friend for the time being.

Peggy heard a faint knock at her bedroom door and she welcomed the visitor.

“Hey, English. I’m ready to head out. Are you sure you don’t want to come to my family’s Fourth of July party? We can leave early if you’re still feeling sick.”

“Yes, I’m sure. You have fun though.”

“Well, okay. I’ll try to come home early, and I’ll pick you up something on the way home. Get some rest, okay English?”

“I’ll try.”

Angie smiled softly before leaving the room. She heard the soft click of the front door closing, and when she felt like she was finally alone- Peggy climbed out of bed and found herself in one of the many sitting rooms her new home had.

It was the darkest of all the sitting rooms, the curtains nearly black and thick, and the only light in the room was from the orange glow of the fire Peggy had just lit in the fireplace. It was much too hot for a fire, but Peggy didn’t want the sun to touch her. She didn’t want to be reminded that it was day. She wanted to pretend that it was night, so that the next day may come sooner.

She poured herself a bourbon and sat on the sofa. She stared at the fire, not caring that her eyes burned. They burned from the fire and from the tears that hid behind her eyelids. She still didn’t allow herself to cry, so the burning only reminded her of her pain. She worried that if she cried, she’d forget. She knew her logic was ludicrous, but there was no reasoning with Peggy, not even with herself.

She drank her bourbon, maybe too quickly, and poured herself another. She poured and poured until the decanter was empty. The golden liquid sat in her stomach and coursed through her veins. She felt a false sense of happiness and the sudden urge to dance.

She stumbled towards the gramophone. She removed a record from its sleeve and placed it on top the turntable. Soft pops and cracks emitted from the horn and were soon followed by the gentle crooning of Connie Boswell.

Peggy stepped away from the gramophone and began to sway with the music. She closed her eyes and hummed along to the melody. The record played through completely and Peggy started it over again. She repeated this every time the record stopped playing.

After the third play through, she felt a strong and familiar hand on the small of her back. She opened her eyes and saw Steve standing in front of her.

“Steve? How? When?” she choked out.

“Don’t worry about that,” he whispered; his voice an echo, “I’m here. I couldn’t leave my best girl behind, not when I owe her a dance. Plus, it’s my birthday. I can’t think of a better way to spend it than with you.”

Peggy curled into him. She expected to feel his warmth, but he only felt cold. He wasn’t real. He wasn’t really here in front of her. He was a vision, a memory conjured up by the alcohol and sadness. But even so, she was happy to see him.

“Oh, Steve. I’ve missed you so much.” 

Tears were finally falling down her face. Each tear that fell took away the weight from her heart.

“I miss you too, Peggy.”

He placed a soft kiss on her head and held her as they danced. This Steve never stepped on her toes, another indication that he wasn’t real. She held on to him tightly and pressed soft kisses on his chest and face. She avoided his lips because kissing a ghost was not kissing Steve.

The tears never stopped falling and with each passing second, they became fatter and they fell harder. She was a sobbing mess in Steve’s (no, not Steve) arms. He whispered soothing words, but they fell in one ear and out the other. They weren’t comforting at all. They were just a repetition of words she’d say to herself. She knew that this Steve was not only a ghost of a future never to be had, but she knew that he was here for a final goodbye.

She pressed harder against him. She wasn’t ready to say goodbye but she had to anyway. She kissed him one last time on the cheek and whispered a sad goodbye. 

He slowly began to fade away, and when she heard Angie speak, he disappeared completely.

“Mind if I cut in?” She whispered as she stepped closer to Peggy. 

“Angie...” Peggy whimpered. 

“Sorry, didn’t mean to scare ya.” Angie was finally close enough to see the tears that stained the Englishwoman’s face. “Peggy, are you alright? What’s wrong? Why are you crying?”

Peggy couldn’t answer, she just fell into Angie’s arms. She could feel the woman’s warmth and she breathed in her scent like she was taking her final breath. Angie was here. Angie was real.

Angie finally realised what was causing Peggy so much anguish. 

“This is about... him, isn’t it?” Angie couldn’t say his name, not yet. She wasn’t ready and she felt that Peggy wasn’t ready either.

“Yes. Today is his birthday.”

“I’m sorry, honey. Why didn’t you say something earlier? I feel like a bad friend for abandoning you.”

“No, please don’t feel bad on my account. I wanted to be alone, actually I needed to be alone. But now, I’m glad you’re here.”

Angie wrapped her arms around Peggy’s waist and pulled her closer. A new song began to play, ‘Blue Moon’. Peggy smiled at the timing. The song was fitting. Before she was alone, without a dream in her heart, and without a love of her own. But now she had Angie. Angie had turned her blue moon into one that now shined gold. Although she still wasn’t fully ready to call Angie her love, she was ready to take the steps forward.

Angie sang along and they swayed gently together. When the song ended and the record no longer played, they stayed close together and Angie continued to sing.

With each passing second, Peggy’s heart began to feel lighter. It warmed in her chest and thumped back to life. 

“Hey, Peg.” Angie stopped singing and Peggy hummed in response. “I’m ready when you are. Just say the word and I’m yours.”

Peggy lifted her head and looked into Angie’s eyes. Angie was ready; Peggy could see that. Angie wanted to begin a new life with Peggy and she was finally ready, too, but Steve’s memory still lingered. But one day it wouldn’t, and on that day she will finally become Angie’s. She’ll finally have someone to adore and someone to adore her. Her arms would finally have someone to hold. 

Peggy placed a genuine kiss on Angie’s cheek. “I know, darling. Soon”

They held each other and danced until they couldn’t stand any longer. They went to bed- separately- with the promise of soon still swirling in their minds.

**Author's Note:**

> tumblr: [ginavstheworld](http://www.ginavstheworld.tumblr.com/)


End file.
